If I were to go along with these suggestions for holiday tipping, I’d be dishing out $555.

Does anyone spend that much on holiday tips? Seriously?

I tip my hairdresser (not the price of a haircut, either — I can barely afford her in the first place), I’ll tip the nanny (also not as much as suggested) and probably my newspaper deliveryman since he puts it inside my door, which is killer.

Someone in the story suggests giving the garbage men a plate of cookies. Um, yeah, I plan to leave a nice plate of goodies right on top of my GARBAGE CAN. I bet they’d appreciate that! And the whole thing about buying a gift for your mailman is funny, too. They’re not allowed to accept cash, so I’m supposed to go find a thoughtful gift (less than $20!) for the guy who drops off my mail. I’m afraid I sound like a curmudgeon, but please. I have better things to do.

Like bitch about Christmas on my blog.